It's only Tuesday, and it's already shaping up to be a ridiculous week. Observe:
15-year-old boys on the subject of Brokeback Mountain:
"God! Why would anyone make a movie like that? Who cares?! I mean - God!"
Most ridiculous celebrity sighting of the day:
My brother was walking with a co-worker down a street in Manhattan and literally ran into Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. While standing 2 feet away from the literary icon, all Matt's buddy could think to do was point and say, "It's Kurt Vonnegut!"
My most ridiculously inappropriate teacher comment/action of the week (year?)
A female student who was standing next to me was overly anxious to pass something out to the class. I reached out my arm to hold her back and, unfortunately, my palm landed squarely on her boob. Most likely no one would have noticed had I not shouted out in horror, "Oh God, Jen! I just grabbed your boob!" Now I can't be positive, but I'm pretty sure that the scarlet hue of her face and icy glare a full 20 minutes after the fact means that everything is cool between us now.
Most ridiculous case of literary confusion:
A group of students created a videotaped project where they reenacted scenes from William Faulkner's short story "A Rose for Emily." Somehow, they completely overlooked the fact that Miss Emily KILLED A MAN AND KEPT HIS CORPSE IN HER BED FOR 15 YEARS, instead choosing to focus on one tiny phrase that may or may not indicate that one of the characters may or not not be gay. An actual ad-libbed line, "Homer, we're breaking up. And I want my beads back!"
Most ridiculous dance move: In a second videotaped scene, students decided to end the tape with a blooper reel. One scene consisted of a male student rubbing his butt in the camera lens and whispering "it's juicy" over and over. How, exactly, does one assess that?
Most ridiculous Corey Haim sighting of the week:
15-year-old boys on the subject of Brokeback Mountain:
"God! Why would anyone make a movie like that? Who cares?! I mean - God!"
Most ridiculous celebrity sighting of the day:
My brother was walking with a co-worker down a street in Manhattan and literally ran into Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. While standing 2 feet away from the literary icon, all Matt's buddy could think to do was point and say, "It's Kurt Vonnegut!"
My most ridiculously inappropriate teacher comment/action of the week (year?)
A female student who was standing next to me was overly anxious to pass something out to the class. I reached out my arm to hold her back and, unfortunately, my palm landed squarely on her boob. Most likely no one would have noticed had I not shouted out in horror, "Oh God, Jen! I just grabbed your boob!" Now I can't be positive, but I'm pretty sure that the scarlet hue of her face and icy glare a full 20 minutes after the fact means that everything is cool between us now.
Most ridiculous case of literary confusion:
A group of students created a videotaped project where they reenacted scenes from William Faulkner's short story "A Rose for Emily." Somehow, they completely overlooked the fact that Miss Emily KILLED A MAN AND KEPT HIS CORPSE IN HER BED FOR 15 YEARS, instead choosing to focus on one tiny phrase that may or may not indicate that one of the characters may or not not be gay. An actual ad-libbed line, "Homer, we're breaking up. And I want my beads back!"
Most ridiculous dance move: In a second videotaped scene, students decided to end the tape with a blooper reel. One scene consisted of a male student rubbing his butt in the camera lens and whispering "it's juicy" over and over. How, exactly, does one assess that?
Most ridiculous Corey Haim sighting of the week:
Happy birthday Hayden and Grandpa Ager, but who invited the ghost of Corey Haim's younger, slimmer and more promising self to the party?
Really? It's only Tuesday??
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