Because it feels like it's been a while, and because my school district - despite housing only a minutia of Jewish families - inexplicably decided to take the day off for Rosh Hashanah, I'm going to make this one extra long, rambling and pointless for you. You're welcome.
Three of the Dumbest Things I've Done/Said This Week:
1. Galavanted around last weekend in the rain, spurned adequate rest, diet and Zicam's recommendations for best results (i.e. use it more than once if you expect it to work, eeediot) and caught me a icky cold. *sneeze* Boo. *sniff*
2. Put all my week 1 fantasy football hopes and dreams in Steven Jackson's fugly corner. (Perhaps more unfortunate than dumb, but...well, it still hurts. You know?)
3. Asked my husband, "How often does Entertainment Weekly come, anyway?"
Three Things I'm Currently Excited About:
1. New Band of Horses
2. The Darjeeling Limited
3. Cider Mills
Three of the Best Student Responses of the Week:
1. In response to the question, "Jonathan Edwards says it's natural men who should fear God? What do you think it means to be a 'natural man'?," a student proudly answered, "A lumberjack!"
2. In response to the question, "Based on the readings, traditional early-American folklore and what you know about the Puritan position on the natural world, where do you think they thought the Devil could be found?," a student, in complete serious, answered, "Georgia?"
3. In response to my syllabus, a shy 9th grader raised her hand and inquired, "Will we watch very many movies in here? Because we did that all last year and I really want to learn this year. And you seem funny, so I'd rather hear you talk anyway."
(True story, folks. Is she a sycophant? Perhaps. Did it work? Ohhhhhh yes.)
Three Things Recently Read/Seen on the Internet that Made me Laugh:
1. Yahoo Sports's advice on the subject of Tom Brady's limited participation in Wednesday's practice: "This is par for the course. Brady will be listed as probable on the official injury report Friday, play on Sunday and date a super model all week."
2. New McSweeney's: I See No Other Option than to Resign as Emily Dickinson's Rap-Battle Coach, although the title is probably the funniest thing about it.
3. This video Steve sent me on the impotence of spill cheeking:
And finally, Three Ways I Plan to Spend My Rosh Hashanah:
Alternating between sneezing, imploring the almighty Master of the Universe to forgive me of all my sinning, and remembering that I'm not Jewish.
Three of the Dumbest Things I've Done/Said This Week:
1. Galavanted around last weekend in the rain, spurned adequate rest, diet and Zicam's recommendations for best results (i.e. use it more than once if you expect it to work, eeediot) and caught me a icky cold. *sneeze* Boo. *sniff*
2. Put all my week 1 fantasy football hopes and dreams in Steven Jackson's fugly corner. (Perhaps more unfortunate than dumb, but...well, it still hurts. You know?)
3. Asked my husband, "How often does Entertainment Weekly come, anyway?"
Three Things I'm Currently Excited About:
1. New Band of Horses
2. The Darjeeling Limited
3. Cider Mills
Three of the Best Student Responses of the Week:
1. In response to the question, "Jonathan Edwards says it's natural men who should fear God? What do you think it means to be a 'natural man'?," a student proudly answered, "A lumberjack!"
2. In response to the question, "Based on the readings, traditional early-American folklore and what you know about the Puritan position on the natural world, where do you think they thought the Devil could be found?," a student, in complete serious, answered, "Georgia?"
3. In response to my syllabus, a shy 9th grader raised her hand and inquired, "Will we watch very many movies in here? Because we did that all last year and I really want to learn this year. And you seem funny, so I'd rather hear you talk anyway."
(True story, folks. Is she a sycophant? Perhaps. Did it work? Ohhhhhh yes.)
Three Things Recently Read/Seen on the Internet that Made me Laugh:
1. Yahoo Sports's advice on the subject of Tom Brady's limited participation in Wednesday's practice: "This is par for the course. Brady will be listed as probable on the official injury report Friday, play on Sunday and date a super model all week."
2. New McSweeney's: I See No Other Option than to Resign as Emily Dickinson's Rap-Battle Coach, although the title is probably the funniest thing about it.
3. This video Steve sent me on the impotence of spill cheeking:
And finally, Three Ways I Plan to Spend My Rosh Hashanah:
Alternating between sneezing, imploring the almighty Master of the Universe to forgive me of all my sinning, and remembering that I'm not Jewish.
4 Comments:
You too babe? A cold's been threatening me all week, but it awakened full force this morning. I too blame it on the rain (yeah, yeah), but know it's probably only my own damn fault.
So, is tomorrow going to be another Friday where we turn on a movie and then fall asleep by 10? If so, then at least let's pick something better than the Black Dahlia. Regardless, I don't feel as awful as I did for our last girly weekend, and I should be able to muster up energy for shopping or trouble. Let's pledge to both get our rest tonight, ok? We can't let those boys have all the fun.
I can't promise to get too much rest tonight, seeing as Kevin will be here (and will apparently be making me dinner, despite my complete and utter lack of groceries), but I will make these promises re: girls' weekend:
1. I will not crash before midnight on any given night.
2. I will be careful not to sneeze on anyone, will be diligent about washing my hands, and will clean up after my used kleenexes before Chloe gets a chance to eat them all (an unfortunate habit I can't break her from).
3. I will not watch anything starring Scarlett Johansson, who I'm finally coming to realize is very, very pretty, but the female equivalent of Keanu Reeves.
Sound like a plan? :)
I have Steven Jackson, too. And Drew Brees. Week 2 almost has to be better than Week 1.
Both of the the disappointment twins, eh? No good. It's scary when to read experts recommending that you can still make a good trade for Steven Jackson if you act soon. What happened to #2 ranked RB? Blah. Better be a fluke.
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