things i want to do, but will probably never do, and that's alright because i probably shouldn't do them anyway

(explanations provided when I felt like providing them)

• shave my head (I'm pretty sure it would simplify things tremendously, and I suspect my head is relatively lump-free.)

• sell my house, pack my bags and move to a big city with a more temperate climate

• get another tattoo (A triforce on my hand could quite possibly place me in the running for the biggest geek on the planet, would it not?)

• learn to shoot a gun

• tell administration what I honestly think (and actually sign my name to the letter this time...)
  

• punch someone in the face (but only someone who has done something positively despicable to deserve it, of course)

• wrestle an alligator

• attempt to live amongst wild grizzly bears, chimps, and/or orangutan
  

• master the fine art of the nunchuck
  

• vacation in India

• quit my job, dye my hair pink and form a synth-pop duo (care to join me?)