Wednesday, July 01, 2009
glamoroso me
Most people may not consider teaching to be a glamorous job. However, that's only because they've never seen how I do it.

I mean sure - tantrums are frequent, you have to hold your pee all day, occasionally you come home with chalk dust on your ass and sometimes there's vomit, but we don't ALL wear holiday sweaters adorned with giant plastic pins, and if you play your cards right you can swing yourself some pretty sweet swag. Case in point: my job is sending me to Spain next week. That's right doctors and lawyers and professory types - Spain. To visit. For free. And all I have to do is make sure a handful of kids board the right plane, don't come home pregnant, answer their wake up calls, and don't get gored by bulls. (Wearing a holiday sweater while I do all this is, of course, optional.)

So, in the spirit of my upcoming intercontinental adventure, I've been trying to brush up on my Spanish. I originally had this grand plan to get myself some instructional CDs that I could listen to on the commute to work, but then I remembered that this is 2009. If robots don't do it for us then there's an app that will, so actually learning a language has become a bit...passé. So I searched around for a few minutes and, sure enough, there was an application available to download onto my phone that would not only translate useful words and phrases, it would even say them for me. I know, right?! Sweet Jesus, Hallelujah! Here I've been so busy dreaming of a day when I could somehow avoid all direct communication with strangers that I had failed to recognize that day when it finally arrived. Hello, brave new world!

Now, truthfully, the system isn't perfect. There's a very limited number of words and phrases that my phone will say for me, however, it will say "hello," "goodbye," and "I'm sorry" for me, so what else does a socially awkward English-speaking girl really need?

Well, after consulting the app's "Travel Safety" list, it appears that the creators of this particular application feel that an English-speaking girl traveling in sunny Spain also needs to be able to say:
Don't shoot!
Stop thief!
and best of all:
Those drugs aren't mine!

Yep, it's a glamorous place I'm headed to for my glamorous job. Better pack my nicest holiday sweater.

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Blogger Abs said...

It would be funny--I mean horrific-- if you got over there and found out your phone won't work in Spain. I wonder how many people that happens to. Any chance any of your students won't have SIM cards and international networks?

Blogger Mrs. White said...

Yeah, I'm actually not very confident in that. I'm going to call and have it activated to use overseas, but I've heard some HORROR stories of people using their iPhones in Europe and racking up redonkulous bills for, like, a few text messages and a couple minutes on the Internet. I'm hoping to have my phone off most of the time and just have it in case of emergencies. (Like when I need it to tell the cops that 'those drugs aren't mine ;)

Blogger Bibliolatrist said...

That's so awesome! I just returned from Italy, courtesy of my school. I couldn't have dreamed an easier gig - I'm so thankful to have had this opportunity.

I bought an international calling card worth 5 euro. It gave me 2+ hours of calling time, and I still had an hour left by the end of the trip. They're apparently available at kiosks all over Europe.

Have an amazing trip!

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