Tuesday, March 10, 2009
me and my ACT
In 2007 it became a state mandate that all high school juniors, college bound or no, take the ACT, and so today I had the "honor" of becoming a member of a terrifically limited, highly elite group of people charged with administering the ACT for the third straight year in a row. What this means is I had got to spend four hours in a cave-like room watching 25 juniors half-ass their way through the test. I wasn't allowed to read, write, grade, sit, eat or drink. For the third bloody year in a row.

I'm not sure why I keep getting selected for this task, so I can only assume that The Powers That Be must have noticed how incredibly adept I am in all areas of the test proctoring trifecta: passing out and collecting things, managing a time piece, and staring off blankly into space for long stretches of time. What can I say? It's a gift.

Anyway, since there wasn't much else I could do other than observe, that's precisely what I did. And of my 25 kids:

  • 20 were brunette
  • 5 were blond
  • 4 "rocked" the buzz cut
  • 1's hair was curly
  • 1 wore hers in a strange little puff directly above her forehead

  • 22 were white
  • 1 was black
  • 1 was Latina
  • 1 was 12.5% German, 12.5% English, 12.5% Cherokee, 12.5% Mexican... and after that I sort of stopped listening. (Seriously dude - we had one 5 minute break and THIS is how I had to spend it? listening to you explain why you didn't know what to bubble in under "ethnicity"? It's called "OTHER"!!!)

  • 4 wore glasses
  • 3 didn't, but were perpetually squinty

  • 2 had acne,
  • but only 1 kept picking at it
  • 3 had perpetually runny noses
  • 2 merely looked like they smelled,
  • while 1 most certainly, offensively did

  • 2 tended to rub their foreheads when they concentrated,
  • 4 tugged at their earlobes,
  • and 1 had the unfortunate habit of unconsciously picking at his nose

  • 1 had a face I would call "cherubic"
  • 2 had curious hair
  • 3 had desperate facial hair
  • 1 looked like she'd own a large collection of ceramic dragons
  • 1 looked like she'd own a large collection of knives
  • 2 looked like jocks,
  • but only 1 looked like the sort who'd tape a nerd's butt cheeks together for fun after gym class
  • 4 looked like they could definitely take me in a fight
  • 1 looked like he sort of wanted to try

  • 13 looked like they managed the test fairly well, however
  • 1 kept falling asleep in the middle of the test
  • 2 appeared to answer all the questions in the reading section without even glancing at the reading selection
  • 4 looked as if they had abandoned all hope midway through the math section, and
  • 1 looked like he wasn't even sure where he was

So there you have it - my day hangin' (once again) with the ACT.

(Whheeeeeee!!!!!!! Sure do hope we make AYPeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!)



Blogger Bibliolatrist said...

this post is full of teh awesome.

I'm sorry to hear you got stuck proctoring (I know how that sucks), but you made me laugh...for what that's worth.

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