numerically speaking

So, hi there. How's your Friday treating you so far? Good, I hope. Well, yes, *ahem*, let's begin with lucky number...

7.

According to the master schedule which finally arrived in the mail this week, seven would be the number of years I will have spent teaching the same two classes. Yay. I mean, who needs variety and challenges and expanded horizons, right? Of course, there are others who have much more valid gripes, so perhaps I'll just shut up already and move on to number...

64,

which is the number of days until the release of The Darjeeling Limited. For people who 1) have Wes Anderson somewhere in their "top 5 favorite directors" list, 2) consider Rushmore to be one of their favorite movies of all time, 3) really, really dig Adrien Brody, and 4) hated that they were mildly disappointed by The Life Aquatic, so feel like it's been ages since The Royal Tenenbaums - you know, people like me - that number seems extraordinarily big. But not as big as my golf score, which leads me to...

80,

which would be (roughly) the number of balls hit yesterday at my first trip to the driving range in seven years. My clubs are laughable (the one wood I own is actually made of wood), however my swing is not. And seeing as...

34

is my handicap, I might actually have a chance at not making a complete and total ass out of myself when I participate in the annual family golf tournament this year. Of course, I suppose I should actually play nine holes before I get too cock-sure, but I intend to do that very thing very soon. Soon as I regain all range of motion in my elbow and shoulder and my fingers stop aching, that it. And while I'm still on the subject of large numbers, did you know that

300

is (again, roughly) the number of channels I get with my new cable? Now, there are many who would find this exciting, however I'm just finding it unmanageable. I know that with 300 channels there's probably something worth watching somewhere, but damned if I can weed through it all to find it. Hence,

12

is the number of Law and Order, American Justice, and City Confidential reruns I've watched in the past three days. So yeah, the quality of my viewing habits is pretty much the same as with my lesser, previous cable, although the quantity has increased. As have the nightmares. And finally,

0

is the number of days you have to wait until you can watch The Simpsons movie. From what I've read, I think it's safe to guess that there are a decent number of you who are fairly excited about this, no? And seeing as this post has no discernible end in sight, let's just sit back together and watch Homer take Bart to a gay steel mill. Trust me, you'll thank me on your wedding night.