Sometimes I get ridiculous notions on my drive to and fro work, like, for instance, this one. After all, who could possibly care about the minute details of my day? Certainly not you - a person with a life and hobbies and...taste. But it's a day to celebrate, so what the hey let's do it anyway - let's live blog the last day of my '07 school year.
(And by "live blogging," I mean writing things down on post-it notes as they happen and then writing it all up eight hours later. Allowances and whatnot.)
7:20
And I arrive. 10 minutes late. (Whoops.)
7:21
Continue yesterday’s English department drama in the hallway and manage to get myself all riled up again. I'm counting things off on my digits, wagging my index finger in people's faces and succeed in cursing upwards of seven times in four minutes, the most of the three of us. And the people I'm conversing with are on my side.
7:30
Boot up computer and check e-mail. Four are from parents concerned I have made an error regarding their child’s grade. One is nice, two are bordering on rude and one is downright bitchy. All are incorrect in their accusations. Commence cursing once again, but this time at our on-line gradebook and with significantly less finger wagging.
7:35
Begin to clean out my room/desk. Unexpected discoveries include:
2 Mini Care Bears
1 Furby (broken, thankfully)
1 student-given valentine card that, at the time, I thought was innocent and sweet until yesterday when the giver shouted something veeeery inappropriate at me in the hallway. I realize he really did want me to "Bee" his Valentine. Shiver. Toss it.
2 copies of the same Billie Holiday cd
1 Louis Armstrong cd
1 Music of the Renaissance cd
1 Incubus cd (for some reason)
2 mangled forks
4 confiscated hacky sacks
2 wigs, both blond
5 fake swords/guns
1 giant rope of sage given to me last year by a lovely Native American man who insisted it could either be used to clean out the negative energy in a room or to make a tea which would clean out my bowels. Since it didn't accomplish the first, perhaps I’ll use it to try the second…
8:10
Decide I MUST begin to grade papers if I ever expect to finish. Get through two before I...
8:20
...head to the English office to make coffee and stare forlornly in the mirror at the angry, self-inflicted burn on my forehead received this morning at the hands of a renegade curling iron. Realize no one is there to pity me, sigh, and leave.
8:25
Return to my room and start entering grades in an effort to avoid grading papers. Realize there is only one “A” in my entire 4th hour, and even that is an A-. I wish I could say it's because my standards are that high.
8:45
Gasp at the fact that it’s 8:45, I’ve only graded two essays and 6th hour is due any minute. Decide grading is pointless and instead (out of more curiosity than anything) put in the Music of the Renaissance cd and begin to play tetris.
9:00
6th hour enters. A 5th hour kid pops in my room and places a huge garbage bag under my desk, asking if he can store a body here. I say sure.
9:05
Realize a kid just asked if he could store a body under my desk. Peek inside. Sure enough, there’s mannequin parts inside his bag. I'm curious, however relieved that the torso is plastic rather than actual flesh.
9:15
Final commences. As I distribute the reading section I am called the following names:
Dank
Tyrannous
Maniacal
(See? The vocab journal wasn’t a complete waste of time! Except, since I’m not unpleasantly moist or cold, I don’t think I can, in all fairness, be called “dank.”)
A theory (As in “You’re a theory!” That’s a new one.)
A great big giant meanie pants
9:25
Notice Odd Jon is opting out of taking his final. Instead, he chooses to spend the exam period staring at me the entire time I’m doing my textbook inventory. It's creepy, however not all that unusual, unfortunately.
9:35
Check my e-mail and see that Carrie has an interview. (Yay!) My fingers are crossed and I make a mental note to get my mom on the Catholic hotline. Consider prayer candles already lit.
9:40
This is the quietest my 6th hour has ever been. It would be nice if wasn't making me so nervous…
10:35
All finals are in, most textbooks have been returned, twelve essays have been graded, and level 9 of tetris has been conquered. Great success!
10:38
The bell rings to officially end the last exam period of the year. To celebrate, RJ, one of my specialest students, jumps up on my desk and lifts up his shirt to give a celebratory booby flash. And I, for one, say good for him. Nonetheless, here's to hoping he gets a teacher with a sense of humor next year.
2:00
Realize there's still a bag of mannequin parts under my desk.
It happens, I suppose. At least to me, anyway.
(And by "live blogging," I mean writing things down on post-it notes as they happen and then writing it all up eight hours later. Allowances and whatnot.)
7:20
And I arrive. 10 minutes late. (Whoops.)
7:21
Continue yesterday’s English department drama in the hallway and manage to get myself all riled up again. I'm counting things off on my digits, wagging my index finger in people's faces and succeed in cursing upwards of seven times in four minutes, the most of the three of us. And the people I'm conversing with are on my side.
7:30
Boot up computer and check e-mail. Four are from parents concerned I have made an error regarding their child’s grade. One is nice, two are bordering on rude and one is downright bitchy. All are incorrect in their accusations. Commence cursing once again, but this time at our on-line gradebook and with significantly less finger wagging.
7:35
Begin to clean out my room/desk. Unexpected discoveries include:
2 Mini Care Bears
1 Furby (broken, thankfully)
1 student-given valentine card that, at the time, I thought was innocent and sweet until yesterday when the giver shouted something veeeery inappropriate at me in the hallway. I realize he really did want me to "Bee" his Valentine. Shiver. Toss it.
2 copies of the same Billie Holiday cd
1 Louis Armstrong cd
1 Music of the Renaissance cd
1 Incubus cd (for some reason)
2 mangled forks
4 confiscated hacky sacks
2 wigs, both blond
5 fake swords/guns
1 giant rope of sage given to me last year by a lovely Native American man who insisted it could either be used to clean out the negative energy in a room or to make a tea which would clean out my bowels. Since it didn't accomplish the first, perhaps I’ll use it to try the second…
8:10
Decide I MUST begin to grade papers if I ever expect to finish. Get through two before I...
8:20
...head to the English office to make coffee and stare forlornly in the mirror at the angry, self-inflicted burn on my forehead received this morning at the hands of a renegade curling iron. Realize no one is there to pity me, sigh, and leave.
8:25
Return to my room and start entering grades in an effort to avoid grading papers. Realize there is only one “A” in my entire 4th hour, and even that is an A-. I wish I could say it's because my standards are that high.
8:45
Gasp at the fact that it’s 8:45, I’ve only graded two essays and 6th hour is due any minute. Decide grading is pointless and instead (out of more curiosity than anything) put in the Music of the Renaissance cd and begin to play tetris.
9:00
6th hour enters. A 5th hour kid pops in my room and places a huge garbage bag under my desk, asking if he can store a body here. I say sure.
9:05
Realize a kid just asked if he could store a body under my desk. Peek inside. Sure enough, there’s mannequin parts inside his bag. I'm curious, however relieved that the torso is plastic rather than actual flesh.
9:15
Final commences. As I distribute the reading section I am called the following names:
Dank
Tyrannous
Maniacal
(See? The vocab journal wasn’t a complete waste of time! Except, since I’m not unpleasantly moist or cold, I don’t think I can, in all fairness, be called “dank.”)
A theory (As in “You’re a theory!” That’s a new one.)
A great big giant meanie pants
9:25
Notice Odd Jon is opting out of taking his final. Instead, he chooses to spend the exam period staring at me the entire time I’m doing my textbook inventory. It's creepy, however not all that unusual, unfortunately.
9:35
Check my e-mail and see that Carrie has an interview. (Yay!) My fingers are crossed and I make a mental note to get my mom on the Catholic hotline. Consider prayer candles already lit.
9:40
This is the quietest my 6th hour has ever been. It would be nice if wasn't making me so nervous…
10:35
All finals are in, most textbooks have been returned, twelve essays have been graded, and level 9 of tetris has been conquered. Great success!
10:38
The bell rings to officially end the last exam period of the year. To celebrate, RJ, one of my specialest students, jumps up on my desk and lifts up his shirt to give a celebratory booby flash. And I, for one, say good for him. Nonetheless, here's to hoping he gets a teacher with a sense of humor next year.
2:00
Realize there's still a bag of mannequin parts under my desk.
It happens, I suppose. At least to me, anyway.
2 Comments:
Love it! That's an exam day to a T. I do love that the vocab worked... at least marginally ;).
And I'm soooo looking forward to lunch tomorrow!
Yay! I'm excited I get to celebrate your end of the school year with you this weekend.
And thanks for putting the Catholic hotline to work. Here's to hoping I haven't burned all my good will in that department. :)
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